Studies show everyone at the gym knows you have no idea what you’re doing. 

New research has officially proven the longly speculated theory; you going to the gym is a major inconvenience for everyone else. Key eyewitnesses stated there were looks of amusement and confusion across the gym the second you walked in the doors. Soon after these looks turned to worry when the sounds of you gasping on the stairmaster could be heard at the smith machines. 

A focus group was surveyed about the matter and the results were unanimous. “The only thing gained from that workout was a mix of entertainment and secondhand embarrassment.”  One respondent went so far as to say, “Every rep they did was like a hate crime against proper form. I was genuinely tempted to intervene.” Others were not as merciful about the situation, one even suggesting they wanted to resort to violence against your erratic behavior. 

Gym regulars' workouts were completely ruined by your antics, they were equally as distracting as they were pitiful. Researchers had inconclusive results on what fluid accumulated on the bench you had sat on during your “workout.” Is it really possible you could have sweat that much? All things considered, that is quite concerning. So next time you get a surge of motivation and feel like “bettering yourself,” don't, you look fucking ridiculous.